Ideals and Public Perception - Berakhot 43
We first find three sayings of Rabbi Zutra, the first only loosely connected to the topic of blessings by its attention to “beauty” and the second simply another saying of Rabbi Zutra, What does Ecclesiastes 3 mean by “God made everything beautiful in its time/season?” Just that God makes everyone find his own profession beautiful. This is sometimes true in human experience, but certainly not always! In the second saying, at night a torch is like two people and the moon is like three – for vision? No: in order to ward off “evil spirits,” which may harm one, show themselves to two, but hide from three – the Talmud it self doesn’t even use the word for “spirits,” but the implication of their danger is clear.
It is the third saying of Rabbi Zutra that is the most inspirational: “It is better for a person to throw himself into a fiery furnace rather than put his fellow to shame (literally yalbin panav -“make his face pale”) in public.” And where do we learn this? From the story of Judah and Tamar in Genesis 38, where she didn’t publicly shame Judah even though she was threatened with a fiery death for being thought promiscuous. THIS is an inspirational ethical lesson for any age, and it is a pleasant surprise to learn it from the example of a Biblical woman.
Much of the remainder of the page is spent interpreting what is considered “unbecoming” for a scholar (literally Talmid Khakham – “wise student”): going into the street/market perfumed, going out at night alone, talking to a woman in the street, eating a meal with the ignorant (amei-ha-aretz, literally “people of the ground” or “peasants”), being the last to enter the Beit Midrash (house of study), and some say taking long strides or walking stiffly. The page goes on to clarify the perfume restriction applies only when going to “a place where people suspect laying down with males” – a very interesting anecdote for further historical study. Why not go out alone or speak with women? People might suspect immorality, even with one’s female relatives since they may not know you are related. Why not eat with the ignorant? One might be drawn astray. Why not be the last to the Beit Midrash? This one, at least, is obvious to us as well – lest one be thought an idler.
Today, the fear of public suspicion is much less of a concern – as Oscar Wilde said, “the only thing worse than being talked about is NOT being talked about.” Heaven forbid that one eat with those of a different perspective, or risk suspicion to talk with one’s sister, or enjoy one’s life outside of formal obligations as one wishes. Thank goodness for our freedoms today to do just that.
Rabbi Adam Chalom